It’s a well known fact that Americans are notorious germaphobes. Obviously it hasn’t always been like this, when I was a child a remember dust bunnies as large as kittens rolling through our kitchen. They provided a wealth of fodder for the imagination and we still managed to grow up to be healthy, living adults. At some point between then and now, some genius remembered the phrase, “cleanliness is next to godliness” and took us all the way to the five hundred dollar vacuum cleaner.
Today I took out a well trusted friend. The broom. Lightweight and dependable, the broom is a cleaning marvel to behold. No electricity, batteries, filters, scrubbing pads, cleaning pads, earplugs, safety glasses, ventilators, instructions in Spanish, English, and French required. All you need to operate one is the intelligence of a three year old and hands.
And it does a remarkable job of cleaning up dirt. Sure, it doesn’t suck the dust through thirty layers of HEPA filter or smash the offending dirt into oblivion with Level 3 Cycloneâ„¢ technology. It just grabs it lightly and pushes it together to be thrown into the trash when enough is collected. I was able to listen to music, the dogs remained sleeping and our wood floors were free of dirt when I hung it back up.
All hail our good friend, the broom. Dependable and sturdy. Unlike this cheeky fancy ass.